J R Compton's Cosmic Coping Kit
of Metaphysical Knowledge
Wherever you go, there you are.
You are the most important person in your life.
It may be self-ish, but not selfish to put you first.
Being the best you you can be
is the most important task in your life.
Be your own best friend.
Take care of yourself — it's the only self you got.
To love or trust others, first you have to learn to love and trust you.
If you don't know who you are,
you are doomed to live in reaction to others.
You are not in your body.
You are your body.
You are what you do.
If it feels good, do it.
If it hurts, stop.
Play outside every day.
Listen and let children tell you how they feel.
Big kids do cry. That's why we have tear ducts.
Tears cleanse the body and the soul.
It's okay to have feelings — any feelings.
Feelings come from inside.
No one else is responsible for your feelings.
What people — especially children — do may be wrong.
But we have no control over our feelings.
Never shame anyone for feeling.
Each of us is important and special.
We were meant to be who we are.
Deep down inside, you always know what you should do.
Learn to listen to that voice and act on it.
It's important to make mistakes.
If you don't risk making mistakes,
you'll never learn anything new.
You never know how far is enough, until you go too far.
Learning happens when facts become knowledge by being useful.
Sometimes the facts aren't true.
The truth is three out of three.
If you believe in it, it works.
They have purpose, but they are unplanned.
Like dreams, they imply what we infer.
Rational wisdom is important. Intuitive action is essential.
The first step in changing any negative behavior
is to deny there's a problem.
Two steps forward & one step back
You need to stop doing what you're doing to find out what you're doing.
Transitions are letting go of the past while grabbing at the future.
In the between there's nothing to hang on to but your self.
The lessons in life that keep coming back are most important.
They keep coming back so we'll learn the deep-down lessons beneath them. They come in different ways so we'll learn them on different levels.
Dreams are the subconscious mind's way of working through important issues.
Don't worry about the dreams you don't remember.
Recurring dreams are the ones we can learn the most from.
Your interpretation is the only one that counts.
You'll drive yourself crazy if you insist on doing the impossible.
Thankless jobs aren't worth doing.
Recognizing that you are powerless is more courageous
than trying to change the unchangeable.
Accepting powerlessness causes contentedness.
Changing the things you can change is heroic.
Knowing the difference between what you can change
and what you can't is the key to happiness.
Change is scary. And fear hurts.
Often, when we're scared, we act angry
and frighten ourselves and others.
Be here now.
Sometimes, there's no fixing it, there's just living with it.
Change is the only constant.
Happiness is fearless progress.
Only the Mutants Survive.
Familiar journeys are shorter.
The long road may be better.
Worrying is "praying" for the wrong thing to happen.
Prayer and worry are repetitive, goal-oriented thinking.
Both open us to possibilities, making them probabilities.
If you hear it often enough, you'll begin to believe it — even if it's not true.
Learn to catch yourself when you say or think negatively about yourself.
You probably learned those words
from someone else, and
they've been repeated so often
they've become a part of you.
When you say something negative,
correct yourself aloud.
Then say something positive.
If you repeat something often enough, you'll believe it.
If your repetitions are affirmative, so will be your life.
If you believe in something, it will work for you.
Even if you don't like something, the more you see or say or think it,
the more you'll like it.
Replace the no-nos with yes-yeses.
Habits are anything you do repetitively.
Good habits can replace bad habits.
But it takes time and effort.
It's often simple, but it's rarely easy.
People are more important.
Friends are the best people of all.
Friends are those whose inconsistencies we can overlook.
Enemies are people whose contradictions we will not tolerate.
Different friends are for different purposes.
Some people show love by feeding your face.
Real love feeds your soul.
Say people's names to them and smile.
We are here to know, love and serve our fellow beings and to be happy with them on Earth.
To have a friend, be a friend.
Friendships don't last forever.
Long-term friends are solid gold.
Like unalloyed gold, they bend and change shape easily.
Also like gold, they are beautiful and valuable.
Real friends are there for you even when they're not there with you.
People are different people to different people.
Grudges weigh more heavily on you than they could ever hurt the grudgee.
We are all inter-dependent on each other.
Both a lender and a borrower be.
Return and have returned unto thee —
Only friendship is free.
The Minimum Daily Requirement is two hugs.
Love is possible, but it needs effort.
Love is the ability and willingness to allow those you care for
to be what they choose for themselves —
without insisting they satisfy you.
"Falling in love" is not love.
Love is a commitment, not a giddy feeling.
For love to happen, Passion, Intimacy and Commitment
must be balanced on a foundation of Respect.
Passion is shared intense interest.
When we try to possess someone, we're out of balance.
Intimacy is not sex; it is me teaching you about me.
We can't get to intimacy without going through our vulnerabilities.
To feel intimate, we must feel secure.
All relationships have pain.
When pain outweighs pleasure, reconsider.
The basic rules for any relationship are simple:
- Show up.
- Pay attention.
- Tell the truth.
- Let go of the outcome.
Show your children love by touching and holding them often.
Teach your children how to love by touching and holding your loved ones often.
No one is all male or all female. We are each a mix of masculine and feminine.
Don't compare yourself with other people.
You are not better or worse — just different.
All men are not created equal.
Every person is unique and different and special.
Don't do it if somebody else should be doing it.
Protecting someone from life's lessons is the worst thing
you can do for them — or you.
It's not a gift; it's a time-bomb.
Disease is any condition of the mind or body over which someone has lost control.
Alcoholism, Co-dependency, and addiction to drugs, money,
sex, love or control are the secret diseases.
Your diseases are not your fault.
They are, however, your responsibility.
If it causes problems, it is the problem.
Trust someone — but not just anyone.
It is very difficult not to become angry with someone for being in their disease.
The best thing to say to someone who is grieving is
"What happened?" Then just keep listening.
Grief only goes away when you tell someone all about it.
It's important to grieve your losses.
Grieve not only what or whom you have already lost
but also for the future that might have been.
Everything in life is five to three against.
Miracles happen every day.
Make another friend.
Give more than you get.
Forgive. Forget. Get on with it.
There is hope.
Make yourself happy.
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© 1996 J R Compton. All Rights Reserved.